Jason Madison Murray

Well babe, 5 years ago today God blessed you with a little boy of your very own.  One you didn't have to share with anyone.  He is such a little miracle.  The doctor had told us to give up.  Miranda was our miracle baby who we didn't think we would ever have.  But wow, when we found out we were pregnant with Ty.  It was the most awesome thing ever, but yet still scary.  4 children is a wonderful blessing.  Our pregnancy was very long and difficult.  You would rub my belly and talk to Baby Ty all the time.  Our most precious time was at bedtime when you would sing him to sleep in my belly.  Remember when it was FINALLY time for our Section.  You were so supportive when you rubbed my hair and whispered to me as Carrie was doing the surgery.  You really loved watching the surgery.  Medicial People.  :)  You talked about how lucky we were that God blessed us once again.  I'll never forget the look on your face when Carrie showed you Ty.  Utter Joy!!!  I'm thankful I got to be a part of that.  It makes me so sad when I think about all the time the two of you should have had together.  God must surely have the greatest purpose for taking you home to Him.  Cause, I don't always get it.  I think we need you here.  I'm so thankful that I have watched you be a father to Kyle.  Now I'll know what you would want for Tyler too.  Honey, I'll do my very very best to be everything to him for both of us.  I promise to tell Tyler how much you loved him every day for the rest of my life.  A part of you will forever live in Tyler Blake Murray!!!!  Thank You Jason & Thank You God for that wonderful gift.       JACE, I LOVE YOU!!!!

 

 

Hey sweetie.  Ty's 5th birthday went very well today.  You would be so very proud of your son.  He's an awesome boy.  We missed you so very very much.  Life still just doesn't seem right without you here.  Even though I wish so much you were, I really do see you in your children.  They love you & miss you so much.  I truely felt the presence of God today.  Thank you for your love.  I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER for helping create these 4 wonderful children!!!!  & for being the best husband in the entire world.            I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!

Hey sweetie!!  Kyle wanted me to write this memory for you because it's late and I made him go to bed.  MAP testing tommorrow.  He had a sports banquet tonight.  Your sweet friend, Ner, took him. (Ty can't go to the bathroom without me) He really acts like Taylor Pearl is his sister.  They are so cute.  I'm glad he has a friend like her.  Her dad's surgery is on Monday.  I will sure keep them in my prayers.  Back to the memory, remember when we had all the problems at school with the ACLU mad because we said prayers in assemblies?  We had some long talks with the kids about standing up for what we believe in, no matter the reprecusions.  Remember our cool sign in the front yard that says, "Dear God, Bless Our Students, In Jesus Name, AMEN!!!  Well, our school really stood up for God.  For the last year only the kids have said the prayers.  But tonight, the big man at school, began the program, talking about the horrible killings in Virginia.  Kyle was real close to the front, and he saw him look at the Dare officer, shrug his shoulders, (like who cares) and he said a prayer.  We were so proud of him for doing that.  Our school is a great school.  We stand up for what we believe in.  That is what God wants us to do.  You would be very very proud.   I love you!!!

Ty feels lots better today.  He says that it itches down inside where we can't reach.  He's a little frusterated that he can't stand at all.  But he says he likes being carried around.  :)  Today was Grandma day.  Ty & I went to lunch with Great-Grandma, Grandma Murray, & Grandma Ida.  We had a really good time.  It was a blessing.  Mom & I were talking today about the old days.   It made me remember the time one Sunday, after church, the whole family went out to eat at China Garden.  We sat around a big long table.  You, JB, & Walter teased about everything.  It was the best time.  You sure loved China Garden.  It was your favorite restaurant.  Except for when they closed to early for the night shift to get takeout.  I remember all the times you called and I drove from Doniphan just to take you something to eat.  I always had to take enough for the other tweedle too. :)   & everyone else.  They all requested brownies and I would make you a special container just for you to make sure you got some.  I'm so proud to be your wife.  I miss you so much.  I will love you forever!!! 

 

 

I'm thankful that God lent you to me even just for a little while.  Until we join together in Heaven, I'm missing & loving you...........

What a day!!  The doctor visit went well.  God blessed us with Kyle & Sissy Jo being okay.  Well, Miranda is still sick, but with good medicine she'll be well in about a week.  Baby Ty on the other hand, has had a NO GOOD, VERY BAD day.  He broke his favorite leg.  His left one.  I can't help but wonder the glory that you are reveling in.  It has to be the most important job ever to take you away from us now, when we are fumbling around down here in this worldy earth.  I truely believe that you are now a Warrior in God's army.   I know how you feel about prophecy, the time is near. 

 

Tyler is the most pitiful looking boy.  It just breaks my heart even more to see him in pain.  His leg hurts ALOT.  Even though his leg is broken, God made it a clean break.  It will heal without surgery.  Everyone at the hospital was very kind.  Brenda (Billy's wife) came in just to check on us.  (& alot of others)Everyone really misses you, & it wasn't even your shift.  It is incredibly kind of the people who worked the weekend of your funeral for your co-workers.  Today, I was able to thank some of them personally.  My heart still breaks for the ones you spent every weekend night with.  I want to THANK the LORD for making it a clean break!!  It's gonna be tough on Ty.  He says he is going to break every trampoline he sees.  Ya know, I think we will help him.  No matter how many precautions (safety net, standing there watching them, etc...) we take, YOU ARE SO RIGHT, trampolines are dangerous.  You wouldn't let us get one after we got rid of our last one, but you would let the kids jump at other places cause they (especially Ty) loves it so much.  He doesn't like it so much anymore.  I promise you, our children will never jump on one again.    Sweetie, we have always known what the most important things in our life are, but today that was reaffirmed.  Ya know, this other person thinks they have it all figured out, but God showed me again today what really matters in life.  This anonymous stuff is just the Devil trying to hurt us.  Won't work!  God blessed me with your children.  There is no greater gift from God.  Or from you!!  Thanks Murray!! 

 

Honey, Mom helped me and I booked the pool at the colesium for Ty's birthday Sunday.  He's really dissapointed he can't swim now.  He's going to dream of the perfect place for it.  I went and picked up his Daddy picture today.  It's the exact height of you.  The picture is a little fuzzy, but  I just can't find a full standing picture of you from head to toe.  Ty is going to be so excited.  He's been asking for it for a long time.  A Daddy, Superman, Spiderman, Batman Birthday!!  Oh yeah, and the bike you promised.  He won't let me forget that. :) 

 

I miss you so so much & I love you more than anyone will ever know.  No one knows  except you, I, & God!!!!!!!!!!! 

Sweetie, my memory for today is about the river.  Go figure.  Current river is our favorite place in the world.  Remember when you used to tell out of town people how awful our river was.  You always told them to go on up to Van Buren.  In all reality, you just didn't want to share.  You said that if we talked up Van Buren then maybe everyone would go there instead.  We have so many many memories of going to the cabin alone together, but this memory is when Bobby, Clarissa & Jaden went with us one weekday last summer.  We went early in the day.  Man, we all got sunburned.  We just hung out together on the boat all day.  Kim & Mike came later in the day.  We had an awesome campfire that night.  You, Bobby, & Clarissa had some other adventures at the river, but I promised Bobby that I would let him write about them.  You sure spent alot of time talking about your adventures with them.  Jace, I sure will miss sitting around the campfire with you this summer.  Remember all the great times we had listening to nature in the night.  Sometimes, that was the best part of our time there.  These pictures were taken that day.                   Babe, I Love You!!!!!!!

 

 

 

Honey, I know it seems like I write a lot.  I can't help it.  I just miss you so blasted much.  This all still seems unreal.  Our whole future is gone.  Life is just at a standstill.  All I can think about is you.  Everything about you.  Ty's birthday is coming up soon.  All he keeps asking for is a Daddy birthday.  He wants a life-size picture of you.  And the bike he remembers you promising him.  It's so hard to believe he's going to be 5.  His birthday just won't be the same without you there.  I was looking through your nightstand a couple of days ago, and guess what I found?  The money you were saving.  There was  a little slip of paper with it that said "Curio cabinet, 11 years, bed & breakfast, Branson, for my wife".  You drew a heart on the paper.  Wow, sweetie, it really makes my heart feel good to know  that you  cherish our anniversary as much as me.  There was quite a bit there, you must have been saving for a while.  Our anniversary was still a couple of months away when you moved to Heaven.  I'm going to use the money to go on our headstone.  Babe, I don't think this pain will ever go away.  Not just for me, but for your whole family.  I just wish you could come back home to me so bad.  Well, sweetie, I'm gonna go lay my head on your pillow and sleep in your favorite t-shirt.  I can still smell you a little bit when I open your dresser drawers.  It's wonderful.  I'll cherish every note, letter, & card you have given me.  Just like I will always cherish every true memory that I have of you.  

           Jason Madison Murray-------I Love You--------Raylene Rose Murray

 

  

Wow, I miss it when you called me Raylene.  Sure wish I could hear it now.  I was just thinking about our last day together.  January 30, 2007.  You had school stuff in the morning.  But you called me as I was picking up Tyler from school.  You just wanted to know if I had taken my stop smoking medicine you got for me.  I told you yes.  You called me Raylene.  You said I had to quit because you love me and want to grow old together.  Babe, you didn't know how much that  statement would mean to me.  Man, am I ever clinging to it today.  You brought me & Ty lunch.  And I helped you with your schoolwork that afternoon.  After supper, you ran out to Michael & Kristi's to get a paper from him.  He told me that you said you couldn't stay long, because you were excited I turned the toy room into a study and you wanted to show me how much you appreciated it.  I'll never forget that night.  Not for the rest of my life.  Thank you so much for your love babe.  The kids say they remember you saying prayers with them that night.  I'm so glad.  Please help God watch over your family.  We all need it now more than ever. 

                                  I love you!!!!!!!

Just wanted to put these pictures on for Christie.  Easter at Jeannie's.  It's amazing how big our kids are getting.  We are all so blessed to have them!!!